Don't Fear the Party

(air fizzing) (air clicking) (bells chiming) Headspace Studios. (relaxing music) (birds chirping) Hi, and welcome to "Sunday Scaries." I'm Dora, a mindfulness teacher here at Headspace. So the other day I was perusing my "Ask Dora" inbox which is filled with so many beautiful questions submitted from our Headspace community. While I was answering a few emails I came across a question from a listener that I thought was super relatable and fitting for the show. It read, "Hi, Dora. "I'm going to have a social gathering this coming Saturday, "and I'm already anxious about it "primarily because it might include a friend "who I've stopped talking to. "Could you let me know how I can get through the week "without worrying as much about it "and have a rather comfortable evening on Saturday?" Now, I think we can all relate to this in some way, that experience of worrying all week about something that's going to happen on the weekend. It's tough, and, I mean, that's why this show exists. What happens when our Sunday Scaries roll into Misery Mondays, Terrified Tuesdays, and Worry Wednesdays? I'm sure you get the point. The first thing that came to mind for me when thinking about this question was a recent trip to San Francisco I took for work. I was set to do a guided meditation in front of a lot of people, and not an easy thing at all, especially when I've been so used to guiding people from the comfort of my own home these last few years. In the past this type of thing would've been hugely anxiety-inducing for me. I would become so focused on the event and so anxious it would consume me. It was as though the event was happening in the next minute even though I knew it was days away. Not only that, but social events, work events, or group events in general can generate this kind of social anxiety you feel when you're unsure of yourself in a new context. How do I act around certain people? And what if people don't like me? I would like to say I've managed to successfully move past this type of social anxiety, yet this is something I'm still working on. However, I have made huge strides in progress, but it's taken a lot of time, therapy, and intentionality. Here's what I've learned so far. The week leading up to the event, or maybe just a few days before, start to pay attention to the different thoughts and emotions that are arising, whether that's through a mindfulness practice, journaling, or even just a few deep breaths. Being present with what you're feeling in a non-judgmental and compassionate way will help to soothe some of those emotions. A favorite exercise of mine is the RAIN technique. It's an acronym for recognize, acknowledge, investigate, and nurture. Here's how it works. First, you recognize what you're experiencing and then you you acknowledge those feelings and investigate why they're there. And...