From Resentment to Peace

(mouse clicks) (bright music) Headspace Studios. (gentle music) Hi everyone, it's Rosie. Welcome to Radio Headspace and to Wednesday. So a few years ago, I had a falling out with a family member. I'd like to keep the details private but let's just say that a debate over something trivial spiraled into a bitter feud. And before I knew it, we weren't speaking. This divide wasn't just a rift between two people. It was a pool of resentment that cast a shadow over family gatherings, causing them to become few and far between. And that brings us to today's theme. How can forgiveness play a role in helping us transition from resentment to peace? How can we entangle the web of hurt and find a path to reconciliation? It's exhausting, but sometimes you have to take the high road even if you've taken it time and time again. But it can help to remember that forgiveness doesn't mean giving away your power. In fact, it's quite the opposite. In my case, part of the reason why I fell into resentment was because I didn't wanna have to be the one, yet again, to extend the olive branch. But the feud with my family member wasn't just hurting our relationship, it was compromising the harmony of our entire family. Through a lot of introspection, I recognized that forgiveness wasn't a sign of weakness, but a symbol of strength. It was about releasing the weight of resentment. That didn't mean that I agreed with him or that I somehow co-signed his behavior. It meant that I was unwilling to allow him to disturb my internal peace. So I took the first step and I called him in hopes of burying the hatchet. I didn't have much of a plan, aside from approaching the call with compassion in mind. The conversation was challenging but it opened a door for dialogue. And after that, there was a period of avoiding each other, which we both needed. But over time, we found common ground, understanding, and eventually decided that some topics need to remain outside of our conversations. We moved from resentment to peace not by forgetting our disagreement, but by understanding and learning from it. (gentle music continues) Sometimes you just have to agree to disagree and that's okay. I can still love someone, even if I don't agree with them, as long as their actions aren't harmful to others. So today I wanted to share some practices that helped me get to a place of peace. Number one, understand forgiveness. Remember, it's not about co-signing hurtful behavior. Let's make that clear. It's about releasing resentment to make space for peace. An exercise that I find helpful is imagining what it would be like to not carry that burden or replay a situation over and over again. Try it and see if any feelings of relief come up for you. You can use that as a sort of crystal ball for forgiveness. (gentle music...